You know, I just felt so sad today. I was standing there in Smith's observing people as I went about my day and there sitting by the entrance on a bench alone was this little old lady. For some reason when I saw her I just saw past all of the wrinkles of age and those deluded images planted in our heads from the day we are born, that old people are gross. What I saw shook me to my very foundation. My strong emotional walls, built up after many years of being a man, came crumbling down, as I saw this old lady, sitting there alone waiting for someone to come. All that loneliness, the sense of uselessness, the nearness to the end of ends just tore me up so much. Maybe it was because I somehow felt connected to her. Like I am going through what she went through. This lady brought me back to this morning where I sat going about my business as the girl who I love, next to me, cried her eyes out. All I wanted to do was reach out and touch her, and show her that someone cares, someone loves her, that I can make her happy, all the while knowing deep down inside that this girl will never share that feeling with me.

That lady brought me back to a feeling of disgust as the young girl the lady reached out towards with simple conversation, spurned the old lady's attempts and turned up her music, all the while rolling her eyes and commenting on how troublesome old people were, devastating the last attempt the elderly lady had that day for some sense of happiness in today's deteriorating society. The same disgust I feel every time I see my ex girlfriend loving up on some guy, when she never would even give me the time of day when we were together.

Finally that lady brought me back to that omnipotent sense of loneliness, where alls you want is someone to understand you. Just wanting someone to reach out and touch you. The same loneliness I feel as I lay in bed alone at night curled up with my soft blanket as I suddenly realize that the only thing in the world that will never judge me, is always there for me to cry on, always there to caress my body and keep me warm, is in fact the only thing I can rely on. That feeling that all your friends have abandoned you, or simply moved on.

All this brings me to a feeling of regret. A feeling that is currently invading my soul as I write this. Regret that I feel when know I could've reached out to this old lady and possibly touch her heart. I could have done anything, simply ask her how her day was, but alas, I did not. Now I find myself feeling cold. I find myself asking why? Why didn't I show her I cared? Even now that I am done writing this I can not find the answer.

A/N: This just happened today and I really needed to express how I felt. This was how I did that. Hopefully it makes sense to someone and maybe it will even connect with you and not be a simple waste of time.